Brian Kantz, Buffalo, NY-based writer and editor

THE NEWBIE DAD - FEBRUARY 2008

To All the Parents Who Survived the 2000s

If you’re a parent and you have an e-mail account, then you’ve undoubtedly received the forwarded message with the emphatic subject line: “To All the Kids Who Survived the 1930’s, 40’s, 50’s, 60’s and 70’s!!” (Yes, double exclamation points on this one!!)

I’ve received this viral e-mail about a dozen times in the past year, most recently from my dad. I guess it’s a “forward to as many people as you know” favorite and has probably worked its way through about a bazillion e-mail accounts so far, pestering more folks than those “Vote for Ron Paul” communiqués.

The text of the e-mail includes a list of about 50 things people used to do that today’s generations don’t do or are no longer allowed to do because we live in such a politically correct, litigation-happy society. Here’s an excerpt:

“First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they were pregnant. They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a can, and didn’t get tested for diabetes. Then after that trauma, we were put to sleep on our tummies in baby cribs covered with bright colored lead-based paints. As infants & children, we would ride in cars with no car seats, booster seats, seat belts or air bags.

“We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a bottle. We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on. No one was able to reach us all day. And we were O.K. We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no lawsuits from these accidents. We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever.

“These generations have produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever! We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL! If YOU are one of them… CONGRATULATIONS! You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids, before the lawyers and the government regulated so much of our lives for our own good. While you are at it, forward it to your kids so they will know how brave (and lucky) their parents were.”

The obvious point of the e-mail is that folks who grew up in the 1930s through 1970s are tough. They had simple, no-frills childhoods and they all turned out to be great people. Personally, I wouldn’t brag about having mothers who smoked and drank while pregnant or having eaten worms and mud pies as a kid, but hey, whatever it takes to get the idea across. As one who was born in the early 1970s, I initially cheered the e-mail and took the opportunity to pat myself on the back: “That’s right, we were tough! Not like today’s spoiled brats! Hooray for me!”

But then I started thinking about the more subtle point of the message: if yesterday’s kids were tough, then today’s kids are spoiled brats because their parents make them that way. Zing. “Hey, wait a second,” I slowly realized. “I’m a parent of two young children. I think this e-mail might be taking a shot at me.”

So now I’m forced to stand up for my parenting decisions. And I don’t care what earlier generations say. No, son, you can’t eat lead-based paint — even if it does build strong-as-lead character. No, son, you can’t run out the door and play on the sandlot all day without supervision! First, I’m not sure if “sandlots” even exist anymore and, if they do, that’s probably where all the shady characters hang out. And no, son, you can’t eat worms. I’m pretty sure they do live in you forever. Whew. OK, I’m glad I got that off my chest. I feel like a responsible parent of the 2000s again.

Of course, I do see the day, maybe 30 years down the road from now, when I’ll be typing an e-mail (or whatever you’ll call communication then) to send to everyone I know. Let’s see, how about something like this: “To All the Parents Who Survived the 2000s: First, we survived listening to those nostalgic tales of our own parents’ childhoods, then we survived living with those spoiled children. If YOU are one of us, all I can say is… CONGRATULATIONS!”


Brian Kantz



		© 2008 Brian Kantz • All rights reserved • Contact Brian

	THE NEWBIE DAD - FEBRUARY 2008 To All the Parents Who Survived the 2000s If you’re a parent and you have an e-mail account, then you’ve undoubtedly received the forwarded message with the emphatic subject line: “To All the Kids Who Survived the 1930’s, 40’s, 50’s, 60’s and 70’s!!” (Yes, double exclamation points on this one!!) I’ve received this viral e-mail about a dozen times in the past year, most recently from my dad. I guess it’s a “forward to as many people as you know” favorite and has probably worked its way through about a bazillion e-mail accounts so far, pestering more folks than those “Vote for Ron Paul” communiqués. The text of the e-mail includes a list of about 50 things people used to do that today’s generations don’t do or are no longer allowed to do because we live in such a politically correct, litigation-happy society. Here’s an excerpt: “First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they were pregnant. They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a can, and didn’t get tested for diabetes. Then after that trauma, we were put to sleep on our tummies in baby cribs covered with bright colored lead-based paints. As infants & children, we would ride in cars with no car seats, booster seats, seat belts or air bags. “We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a bottle. We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on. No one was able to reach us all day. And we were O.K. We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no lawsuits from these accidents. We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever. “These generations have produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever! We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL! If YOU are one of them… CONGRATULATIONS! You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids, before the lawyers and the government regulated so much of our lives for our own good. While you are at it, forward it to your kids so they will know how brave (and lucky) their parents were.” The obvious point of the e-mail is that folks who grew up in the 1930s through 1970s are tough. They had simple, no-frills childhoods and they all turned out to be great people. Personally, I wouldn’t brag about having mothers who smoked and drank while pregnant or having eaten worms and mud pies as a kid, but hey, whatever it takes to get the idea across. As one who was born in the early 1970s, I initially cheered the e-mail and took the opportunity to pat myself on the back: “That’s right, we were tough! Not like today’s spoiled brats! Hooray for me!” But then I started thinking about the more subtle point of the message: if yesterday’s kids were tough, then today’s kids are spoiled brats because their parents make them that way. Zing. “Hey, wait a second,” I slowly realized. “I’m a parent of two young children. I think this e-mail might be taking a shot at me.” So now I’m forced to stand up for my parenting decisions. And I don’t care what earlier generations say. No, son, you can’t eat lead-based paint — even if it does build strong-as-lead character. No, son, you can’t run out the door and play on the sandlot all day without supervision! First, I’m not sure if “sandlots” even exist anymore and, if they do, that’s probably where all the shady characters hang out. And no, son, you can’t eat worms. I’m pretty sure they do live in you forever. Whew. OK, I’m glad I got that off my chest. I feel like a responsible parent of the 2000s again. Of course, I do see the day, maybe 30 years down the road from now, when I’ll be typing an e-mail (or whatever you’ll call communication then) to send to everyone I know. Let’s see, how about something like this: “To All the Parents Who Survived the 2000s: First, we survived listening to those nostalgic tales of our own parents’ childhoods, then we survived living with those spoiled children. If YOU are one of us, all I can say is… CONGRATULATIONS!”